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Faith is worth looking for, if you have the right reasons.

Have some Faith

I saw an interesting video this week. one that had THE ROCK talking about depression. While its short and simplified it summed up something I was searching for for a long time. Something I have even talked about here before, but it bears repeating and in all honesty more people should see and here stories like this. The Video was about having the ability to keep the faith taht things will be okay.

That is an awesome tool my friend. I never had this until I had no choice but to believe it or Die. Even know it can waiver like a flame in a breeze. Sometimes I am the light for others, sometimes I honestly don have much faith in anything. But this I want.

Why should I bother?

When your back is against the wall, when the hordes are at your door there is the mind numbing fear that forces you to collapse, or there is my good friend rage, or there is Faith. Only one of these has any grace. Only one of them lets you walk out of those pits with self respect, only one lets you be the person your children should Aspire to be.

Think about that for a second, the other night I lost my temper a bit, and raised my voice. There is no grace in that however justified. It does not teach my kids to have faith things will be okay. It teaches them to use their anger, it teaches them the Darkside... I was born a Sith. Do I have to stay that way?

Force innuendos aside here seriously My kids deserve to believe things will be okay so they can make the right decisions when hell breaks loose.

How it begins.

You find faith inside yourself. It starts with valuing who you are and seeing yourself honestly. I have met and worked with people with  a fake belief in themselves, I have seen in church the ones who are there to look like they are a certain image. There are creators who instead of being honest about who they are and what they want to be are running from concept to concept following trends. Living Authentically, being honest with yourself is a path to find out where your faith where your trust can come from.

Where it stops.

I spent a lot of time in my youth with no faith. To be honest I was thirty before I valued myself. I said the most outlandish things in the homes of people who deserved my respect because I was wound up in the fear of loosing everything I had. I grew up that way. There was no faith in things working out in our home. There was only "Get ready for the fight, its coming."  I tend to revert in times of fear. Its a constant struggle, but its worth the sensation of knowing there is a path to be where I want to be, a path where my family's journey is a family journey instead of all of us being alone in the same house. I struggle there to. Thats  for another time.